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Top 5 Divorce Myths

There are many myths out there spread between well-meaning friends, family members, and the Internet.  However, many of these myths are simply that – myths and are not based in law or practice.  Here are the top five that are often brought up during a consultation regarding divorce:

  1. Starting/serving the divorce first gives you an advantage. 

There is no legal advantage to starting a divorce.  Minnesota is a no-fault state meaning that you do not need to allege anything happened in order to get a divorce besides that there has been an irretrievable breakdown of your marriage.

However, for some people, being the individual that starts the divorce – the one saying that they are done with this relationship – is something that is important to them.

  1. Your money is frozen upon serving a divorce. 

Once the divorce has commenced, neither party has the legal right to dissipate marital assets.  This means simply – do not sell your car to your brother for a dollar or do not go and buy a Dodge Hellcat once a divorce has started.

Each party has the legal right to use marital funds for normal, necessary expenses that naturally occur.  This can include attorney’s fees.

  1. Leaving the marital home is abandonment 

There is nothing in the law that says if you leave the marital home, you lose it.  In fact, you will absolutely retain your marital interest.

  1. There is an age where children can choose their own parenting time schedule. 

There is no age in Minnesota law that says at this certain age that a child can pick where they want to live.  Age is one of many factors that are reviewed when determining the best interests of a minor child, but it is only one of many.

  1. Someone “wins” a divorce. 

Divorce attorneys are often asked, “what is your win/loss in divorce cases?”  The answer is always, there really is never a “win” in divorce.  Frankly, if the parties are able to reach resolutions in mediation/through negotiations, everyone loses a little in order to reach compromises.  If your divorce case goes to trial, likely no one will win there either as the Court determines what is right for life, and losing that control over your own life decisions, is difficult.

Divorce is a difficult process and it is our hope at Howard Family Law, LLC that we are able to guide a client through the process with knowledge, compassion and support to move our client’s forward into the new phase of their lives.


If you have questions related to a possible dissolution of marriage, child custody questions, or parenting time concerns, please do not hesitate to contact our office (952) 224-9410